A blog too far...

I gave much consideration before writing this post tonight as some things are probably best kept to yourself.

On the other hand, the whole raison d'etre of this thing was to share new experiences with you all in the hope that it may be informative, or at the very least, I could provide some amusement in the face of my adversity. So apologies in advance. You may wish to stop reading now, as today's tale revolves around somewhere entirely opposite from my face, adversity or otherwise.

The past couple of mornings this week whilst going through my daily routine of getting ready for work, lets just say I spotted something unexpected and rather shocking during my time spent in the bathroom. Not that I was in any physical discomfort or that there were any physical anomalies that I was aware of, but something was clearly quite wrong.

I tried some internet-enabled self diagnosis last night which (unsurprisingly) scared the bejeepers out of me and convinced me that having "cheated death" (man-flu stylee) from the mysterious shadow behind my eye, other gremlins could still be lurking.

So this morning, I thought it best to nip down to the surgery and get myself checked out. I explained the situation to the stand-in GP. It's very rare I get to see my actual GP first time, but in the hope that it may help me get in and out of the place quicker, I'll gladly talk to any professional in there who is prepared to listen.

I told him the details and the shocking potential diagnoses I'd found on the internet which led me to be there. His reply surprised me "So you were bothered you might have cancer then?" rather in the same tone as a big kid in the playground would have jeered and said "What are you scared of dogs for?"

Now clearly I'm no doctor, but from the little I do know about cancer, it is something to be pretty fucking scared about. I should also add that I didn't for one minute think that actually was my diagnosis, but I did think it was something worth checking out. What I hadn't thought through, was how I would be examined as he went on to explain it was going to be that examination; the one we have all heard about and laughed at on American sitcoms, but secretly hoped you would never actually encounter yourself. The surprise was such that I missed the opportunity to tell him that he ought to at least buy me dinner first.

Not long afterwards, I was called through to one of the exam rooms where I was shortly followed by the above-mentioned stand in and my regular GP who had decided to come along for the show. "Are you OK?" he asked. I couldn't avoid the absurdity that I was sat there in collar and tie from the waist up and below... a pair of socks, but said yes regardless.

I'll spare the rest of the details (as if anyone was still reading by now anyway), but everything is OK and as embarrassing or uncomfortable as the experience was, it is still a close call as to whether I would rather have been at work.

So how on earth do you finish off a post like this? With a song of course! Not the original video I'm afraid while the YouTube/PRS debate continues, but I couldn't think of anything more appropriate...